Burn Boot Camp Manchester turned six today! I was humbled to be in the gym early this morning and surrounded by our members who have joined this community from various points in time. Day one, year one, today. I take none of this for granted. I know the fitness journey is chock full of ups and downs, peaks and valleys, PRs and failures. To be a consistent anchor in anyone’s journey fuels me with an even deeper purpose because I know what it takes to hang on, trust the process, and grow through transformation.

We often look to fitness as our gateway to happiness, and for short periods of time - it absolutely is. But it’s not our source of happiness. We are. It begins within each of us. This is exactly what Kira (Nolen) talked about today in her cooldowns. 

We are fortunate to have so many members who have been with us for YEARS. It’s a true gift. Being a multi-year member myself, I know it comes with challenges, though. When motivation runs dry, we often look for new inspiration or shiny objects to keep our attention span. To keep what once was, we rely on the things that once were. Yet, we are the ones that are designed to change.

But that’s where Burn Boot Camp excels. We don’t just have an interest in your motivation levels, but who you are as a person and how you are evolving. We want to peel back those layers with you. 

We see the light in you even when you’re grieving. 

We know the athlete in you even when you’re feeling at your worst. 

We know your potential far exceeds what you can do inside the gym, and the impact that you can make in this world. 

I’m celebrating my own journey (soon) with Burn Boot Camp of nine years since I started as a member. NINE YEARS. I’ve taken thousands of camps, and I continue to progress and see results in new ways. But, it’s different now. I’ve shed countless layers, healed demons, and opened up new pockets of space for continued growth. Who I am today is no longer the person who first joined Burn Boot Camp in 2015. Thank goodness. 

I’ve changed. My goals have changed. My body has changed. My mindset has changed. My relationship with food has changed. The people around me have changed. When I first started Burn Boot Camp, I was CHARGED for results. I placed my happiness and worth in my physical appearance; it was all I knew. “If I can just lose these last ten pounds of baby weight, I’ll be happy.” My world revolved around how I could maximize my time and energy for less body fat and more muscle. Within my first several months, I experienced real results and became addicted to the process. I calculated every morsel of food on my plate. When I faced a setback in life, I worked out harder. The rush of endorphins put me in a euphoric state, but the trouble was, it was temporary. I still had to crawl back into bed with my own thoughts, expectations, and pressures I had placed on myself. I had to face the demons that had become a part of me. The same demons that had suppressed my emotions, stiffened my heart and strangled my potential. I lost compassion for myself. I struggled with thoughts like: 

“I’m not strong enough”

“I’ll never be as fast as her”

“No one even sees me”

“Why can’t I do that?”

“I’m not good enough” 

“I don’t deserve that”

Over the years, I’ve learned to look inward. Looking inward created awareness which is far more uncomfortable than ten minutes of burpees (surprisingly). I learned that every single one of these thoughts was an outward expression of my own mental junk that I had been accumulating for years. I was motivated for future results but committed to staying stuck in the present. It didn’t work.

One by one, I peeled back toxic thoughts and tendencies. I rewrote the script to serve and nourish me, and I continue to practice this today. I’ve learned that these destructive thoughts had very little to do with my fitness and everything to do with decades of unfair expectations, societal pressures, opinions of others, and a million little interactions and experiences that left me feeling unworthy. Comparing myself to others became a sport. My chase for perfection was a self-fulfilling prophecy. 

Looking inward created a different dynamic. Instead of chasing my self-worth in my physical appearance, I opted for peace and acceptance. 

I stopped having “cheat days” and just started eating food that made me feel good. I stopped counting every calorie and just started to be mindful. I stopped pushing myself to exhaustion and recognized the value of recovery. I stopped comparing myself to others and used my own progress as a benchmark. I stopped judging my aging body and started celebrating what it could do. I stopped chasing other people’s goals and intentionally created my own. I stopped racing toward my next goal so I could slow down and celebrate the one I just met. What challenged me at 25 no longer challenges me at 38. And ironically, what didn’t challenge me at 25 now challenges me at 38. I’m not experiencing results at the same pace as I was back then because I’m not willing to make the same sacrifices I once was. I have a family now, more responsibility, and a community to serve. My results aren’t as loud, but they are twice as impactful. Yet, I’m still strong as a motherf%$#&* and strive for excellence. The “excitement” of others squatting in my lane that riddled me with self-doubt has settled; today, my lane only has space for me.

My “why” has changed and so have I. As a result, I have a new lens through which I experience my fitness journey. With thoughts and goals that serve me, my Burn Boot Camp journey isn’t isolated to fitness as it once was, but it is the ultimate trek towards a better life, fitness is simply a part of that. Here, we peel back layers one by one without judgment, without shame, and with all the space and grace to keep showing up. 

And for you, I hope there’s a piece of my story that resonates with you, too. If things feel different, be proud of that. You may be changing and that’s a good thing. Take the time to re-evaluate your “why” and shed what no longer serves you.

Thank you for being a part of this community year after year after year after year.